She Is The Sunlight
by blacksouledbutterfly
Summary: In our darkest hours, in the most desperate of times, sometimes we hurt the only people left in the world who truly care about us. Snape/OC


_September 14_

Sometimes I find it almost impossible to believe that Jezzie and I are actually sisters. I know it must be true because my parents would have no reason to lie about that nor to raise a child that isn't their own. But our differences go far beyond that we don't look anything alike which is grounds enough for me to question the validity of our shared parentage. She and I are complete and total opposites.

Sometimes I think that she won't be happy unless she's causing so much mayhem that the world starts to crumble around her. Trouble really should be her middle name where I'm content with just being. I do my work, I have a few friends. I don't see any real reason to cause any kind of chaos while she thrives off it. It's like oxygen to her or a really, really addictive kind of drug. Sometimes I think she was born wrong or something, like some connector in her brain didn't turn out properly and it made her into this wild child. How she could possibly be my sister or the child of out parents is beyond my comprehension.

We don't understand each other. I've known that for quite some time and yet we understand each other better than anyone else in the world could. It's a stark contradiction, I know this and she knows it but that still remains the truth. She plays games; she strings boys along and tries to make them into little lovesick puppies who will do anything for her.

Me? Well, I just try to fix people.

Even when they don't want to be fixed.

- R 

A boy was watching Jezzie and Renvie knew that her sister felt his intense gaze. The edge of her mouth threatened to curl up into a smile. Jezzie was used to being watched. Now, being used to being watched had nothing to do with trying to be cocky, trying to be vain. She was just used to it. She was the mystery girl, the one no one could quite figure out and that's why she got watched. Renvie knew that; Renvie accepted it. She didn't really understand it but she knew it.

She sat across from her sister, talking to her about what had happened in potions class today but she knew that Jezzie wasn't really focusing on anything she was saying. To see them you never would have guessed they were related in any way let alone sisters. Renvie was lithe like a pixie with fiery red hair and beautiful brown eyes that seemed paler than they actually were at first glace. Her face was beautiful but in a way almost childlike, all round features.

Jezzie looked like a ghost of her sister- her hair was almost white blond, more mature features, fuller lips, eyebrows too dark for her hair to look natural and pale, pale blue eyes. Sometimes it seemed like Renvie embodied spring- all elegant beauty and sunshine; sometimes it seemed like Jezzie embodied winter, pale and cold.

For a long time both girls had been a mystery to the others. At first the girls had stuck together and rarely spoke to others, but as time went on their individual personalities seemed to manifest. Renvie had taken it upon herself to befriend the friendless; she was like the patron saint of lost causes, trying her best to make others feel worthy and welcome.

Jezzie had taken to stringing along boys and breaking their hearts. Everyone knew that getting involved with her was almost like asking to get hurt but most of them found that they couldn't help but want to prove that they could be the one to tame her, to make her feel the same for them as they had begun to feel about her.

And everyone knew that the only one who truly knew Jezzie was her older sister. In some ways it was like they were connected beyond what others could understand- as though their very minds were linked. With an empty glance at each other there was some sort of an unseen and unheard communication, like a psychic connection. They always knew instantly what the other one needed or was feeling. It was both unnerving and intriguing.

Renvie stopped talking suddenly, eyes narrowing in on her sister, head tilting slightly to the side. Pursing her lips she let out a slow breath through her nose. "You're up to no good again," she accused, pointing one long finger at her sister's face.

Jezzie watched her sister unblinking, one dark eyebrow lifting slightly. "Am I really?"

"Yes, you are. I know that look, Jez. You only get that look when you're going to do something that will make Mum and Dad mental."

"I don't do anything with the intent of driving Mum and Dad mental," she drawled, tossing her snowy hair over her shoulder. It was a simple gesture but one that Jezzie practiced a long time to make alluring given the right situation. "I do things with the intention of having a bit of fun."

"I don't see how playing with other people's hearts could really be that amusing, I really don't. Doesn't it bother you at all to lead these guys on?"

"I don't lead them on." Again a smile tugged at the edge of her mouth. "They know full well when they start being interested in me that it won't go anywhere. You can't blame me when they come so willingly into it."

"You're shameless. Sometimes I don't understand how we're sisters."

"Sometimes I don't either. Maybe Mum had an affair and I was the result."

"You know Mum would never do that."

"That would explain everything though, wouldn't it?"

"I suppose it would, yes. Who did you pick for your next victim?"

"I haven't picked anyone. I don't always have to. They seem to show interest on their own."

"Who is it this time?"

Jezzie motioned subtly with her chin to a table further back in the library where a group of boys were joking around. Every so often the librarian was glaring daggers in their direction but she couldn't say she blamed them for being so rowdy. She found herself rather bored in the library as well.

Without even needing to be told not to be obvious about looking Renvie's gaze jumped over to the table in question just in time to see who was watching her sister intently, her eyes briefly meeting his dark ones, her eyebrow raising slightly in a manner that almost resembled her sister's. The boy smiled his hello as though he hadn't just been caught staring and shifted his attention back to his friends trying to act as casually as the girls were. "I know him," Renvie said finally, shifting back around to face her sister.

"Do you?"

"He's in my year. We've had a couple of classes together over the years."

"I see."

"Well, he was looking at you. I'll give you that one."

"I already knew he was."

"No, I won't tell you anything I know about him- which isn't that much incidentally."

"I didn't ask you to."

"You didn't have to. I know that look quite well, Jezzie. And I'm not going to help you play your little games."

"When have I ever needed help?"

Renvie closed her mouth with an audible snap. That, she had to concede, was a fair point. Never before had her sister asked for her help in any of her games. But she also knew that her sister could be deceptive to anyone, herself included. "You're still up to something. Scheming."

"Aren't I always?"

"Hmm." It was a noncommittal sound but they both knew she was agreeing. Returning her attention to the parchment in front of her Renvie exhaled the breath she hadn't even been aware she was holding. "He has a brother, you know. In your year I believe."

"Would I know him?"

"Most likely not. Not in your house."

"That means very little, you know."

"Maybe to you it means little but to others it can mean a lot."

Jezzie waved off her sister's comment with one quick flick of her wrist, eyes rolling. "Such trivial things."

"Most things in life can be rather trivial." Sitting back in her seat she studied her younger sister for a moment. "You know the moment I leave he'll most likely come over and speak to you. They always do."

"I know." Resting her arm on the table she held her chin in her palm, smiling at her sister in the closest thing to an innocent way as she could manage. "Don't you have somewhere you need to be right now anyway?"

"You're right, surprisingly." Gathering her things up Renvie avoided that cold gaze of her sister's.

"Where _do_ you go?"

"You're not the only one with secrets, Jez." Renvie's eyes were empty when they shifted back up to her sister. Never before had she slammed the proverbial door on a conversation like that. She had always been more than willing to share her life with Jezzie and the fact that she wasn't this time just made Jezzie all the more curious. "When you start to tell me everything, little sister, then I'll return the favor."

"You know I'll figure it out eventually." It wasn't a threat nor a statement filled with misplaced confidence. It was merely a fact. "I always do."

"You aren't nearly half as clever as you think you are, Jez. Sometimes I think you really are delusional."

"Delusional? No. Sneaky is what I am."

"Indeed." She leveled her gaze to meet the other girl's. "For once I'm asking you to stay out of things. Leave me be."

"Aren't we supposed to look after each other, dear sister? How am I to do that with you keeping secrets?"

"I'm more than capable of looking out for myself. You should worry more about yourself, Jezzie. One day these games of yours will be taken too far and you'll regret the outcome."

"Come now."

"I'm serious. You're so unaware, Jezzie. So unaware."

"Unaware of what?"

"You live off of your beauty. And yes, beauty is a gift. A great gift, but a terrible one as well. It comes with responsibility."

"Always the responsible one."

"One of us has to be." There was an edge of resentment in her voice as she said this, sliding out of her chair with delicate grace. "Merlin knows you wouldn't know responsibility or reason if it bit you on your arse."

"I know how to be responsible, Rennie. I just like to have fun. What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing's wrong with that. In moderation. Everything in moderation, dear sister. Excess is a dangerous thing." Tossing her own hair over her shoulder in a much less practiced gesture than her sister had Renvie stalked out of the library as though she were about to embark on a mission of vast importance when really she was just thankful to be done with this conversation, to get away from her sister for a little while. As much as she loved Jezzie there were times that she couldn't stand to be near her too long, times like this when she was scheming and no doubt looking to hurt another innocent person's feelings.

And it wasn't that Jezzie was cold or cruel. No, she just enjoyed games, enjoyed playing around with people. It was something that Renvie would never, ever understand; it was something Jezzie enjoyed quite a deal.

The soles of her shoes clicking across the polished floor Renvie glanced over her shoulder towards the library to see if her sister was following her though she knew that she wouldn't be. She didn't ever follow her when she was on the hunt but Renvie could always, always hope that one day that would change, she could always hope that her sister would just grow up and start taking what she did more seriously. It was a fool's folly though, a pointless wish.

She edged her way throughout the halls, trying not to slam into other people or be slammed into herself. Sometimes maneuvering through the halls was like taking your life into your hands, was a battle for survival but Renvie was good at those subtle kinds of battles, the simple kinds that left no victims, that never let anyone get hurt.

Making her way down the stairs with her bag on her shoulder and her shoes making a strange kind of music she found her way to the potions classroom, glancing behind her for a moment once again to see if Jezzie had follows her but of course she hadn't. She knew that she hadn't, that she wouldn't. She really had to stop hoping that her sister would do that.

She opened the door quietly, pulling the heavy wood back and slipped through the small opening she had made, closing the door behind her and made her way across the classroom towards the only other person in the room, the one person she had been looking to speak to and knew she would find there.

The corners of her mouth turned up slightly into a smile.

"Hello, Severus."


End file.
